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You're not a real boater until you have...


National Boating Day July 1

By BoatUS
Published: Thursday, July 2, 2009 11:23 AM CDT
ALEXANDRIA, Va., July 1, 2009 - While the U.S. Senate passed a resolution declaring July 1 as National Boating Day, Boat Owners Association of The United States (BoatU.S.) takes a humorous look at boating and sailing and wants every American to know they cannot be considered a "real" boater until they have:

Forgotten to install the drain plug before launching the boat: Suddenly realizing you're ankle deep in water, scrambling to contort over the transom to install the plug, or rushing to get the boat back on the trailer faster than a NASCAR pit crew really means "you've arrived" in recreational boating.

Contracted a case of "raccoon eyes": Caused by permanently attached sunglasses and the sun's rays waves reflecting off the water, the "raccoon eyes" look is characterized by a mask-like whiteness around the eyes surrounded by sunburned cheeks, nose and forehead. Cold, rainy weather is the only known cure.

Sent boating-themed holiday cards: Sailing Santas, lighthouses with Christmas wreaths, Rudolph pulling a boat full of toys, boating-themed holiday cards keep the boating bug alive in the darkest winters. Non-boating family and friends will just think you've gone off the deep end.


Purchased a Jimmy Buffet CD: A favorite of sailboaters, usually accompanied by a blender and a shaker of salt attached to a tether so it does not get lost.

Started shopping for a bigger boat the day after you buy your first one: Also known in the psychological field as "three-feet-i-tis," this disease is characterized by irrational and envious thoughts of larger vessel ownership. Most health plans do not provide for its treatment.

Sanded the boat's bottom, varnished the hull, replaced a plank and enjoyed every minute of it: For old boat lovers, nothing gives a better sense of pride knowing you made your classic look more wonderful than a fine piece of antique furniture.

Seen a sunrise over a glassy waterway and realized you are in Heaven: Most "real" boaters understand that boating and sailing are medically proven to lower blood pressure, whiten teeth, lower cholesterol and delay the aging process.





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Sue B wrote on Jul 2, 2009 12:46 PM:

" I admit to send the Santa Christmas Cards. "

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